Why narrative in counselling

Many has seen the TED talk of Ngozi Adichie on ‘the danger of a single story.’ We sometimes join society in telling single stories, thinly described and limiting stories of many things; who we are in the world, what we can or cannot do, what counts as beauty, restrictive stories about leadership, what it means to be a pastor, a mother, a father…and then also about counselling (or in general helping-practices that would include things like coaching, mentoring and so on).

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Writing about ‘why narrative’ in this piece, comes from an objection I sometimes hear. That is, that narrative is only one approach. Usually, this objection is raised in the context of counselling. And very popular among helping-professions is the notion that we should have as many ‘tools in our tool kit’ as possible. We say that people follow and eclectic approach. They want to be able to choose what works. Perhaps it would be better to qualify, choosing what works ‘for me,’ or better yet ‘the client’ or ‘in this context.’ I itch to be addressing that directly, but the immediate concern is the notion that narrative is somehow very restricted in its approach to working with people in counselling. To the contrary, most passionate narrative practitioners will likely find it freeing and highly relevant to a wide range of counselling concerns. But even outside of counselling…

Being introduced to a narrative approach was like being given keys to almost the entire house, and not just the counselling room. Agreed, narrative should not be seen as the answer to everything. Why? Narrative is not a religion, doctrine, or personality. It is not a set of rules or a recipe. There are many worthy approaches. Still, to think that narrative is restrictive and therefore one should have many ‘tools’ implies a thin understanding of narrative practice.

The first thing I’m excited about is how applicable it is to all aspects of life (outside of the counselling room). I have found that it is not something that narrative counsellors initially realise. Narrative shines brightly on the stage of the world as much as in its original context of therapy since stories are all around us. As Freedman and Combs (1996) says ‘we are born into stories.’

As far as counselling education is concerned it was the best investment I (my parents) could possibly make. It didn’t just offer me a means of doing counselling but indeed life. I’ve used it in doing coaching or facilitation, training on leadership, spirituality, working with values in organisations or understanding organisations as stories, used it in my general role when I was reverend, in preaching… and of course in pastoral care. Beyond the lofty ideals one could have for narrative work I have also found it meaningful in the humbling ‘profession’ of parenting without falling trap to ‘psychologising’ my kids.

Even for those who do work eclectic, having narrative as an informing paradigm makes all the difference. There are things that one might say fits nicely together with narrative, other things that with a bit of thought can be quite useful. And yes, there are also things that are far from complementary. Often the question is not, is it narrative but, how are ideas brought into narrative practice and language. As narrative practitioners we should be careful to judge our narrative peers as much as we invite people in general to mind the arrogant voice of Judgement, to pay attention when it enters the room. When Judgement enters, that is often when Safety and Trust demonstratively exit the room.

In our counselling work we don’t get to decide what ideas those we journey with get to talk about or what gives them meaning. We only have a choice in how we talk about it and the effects it has. This should be the conversation amongst peers also. Often the question is not can, or can narrative not, do or address something but rather, can ‘I’ do that in a narrative way. That is why we are ‘practitioners’ of something. Even if in the moment I’m open to other practices because I have found them useful, or honestly just don’t know yet how to do it in a narrative way, the overall interaction is still characteristically narrative.

There is no shortage of topics, situations, and contexts that people bring into the counselling room (or for that matter the room of life). They then share experiences, stories, talk about characters in particular settings during specific times, past or present. Even the future is present in the hopes, aspirations, or fears and anticipated failures that people bring to what they talk about. If ‘story’ about their life or situations is what they do most naturally, then that is where I prefer to meet them… in their story instead of applying a host of other tips, tricks, and approaches (which may well also be effective).

If there is a story (in counselling or outside this context), and there always is, then a narrative practitioner can make a meaningful contribution in helping to change problem saturated stories into life giving alternatives.

(Original document version WN221015)